Cory Morgan for NDP in Banff Kananaskis!

UPDATE!!!!

It appears that ranking apparatchiks have responded to Cam Westhead’s fearful cries as his nomination was democratically challenged. They have moved to block my effort with efficiency rarely seen among socialists!

Have no fear comrades! I am undaunted & will continue my campaign to ensure that Banff-Kananaskis has superior NDP representation to Cam “The Weenie” Westhead in the next election.

Viva la revolucion!

END UPDATE


Yes, I have had a revelation of sorts. I feel compelled to bring about true transparency in politics through the nomination system.

Everybody knows that the NDP is all one centrally run entity which constitutionally requires their provincial wings to follow the wishes, whims and policy planks of the federal party. While provincial leaders are beholden to their federal superiors, they like to talk a different game when it comes to winning their local seats.

Well its time to end our political double speak and dodging and run local NDP campaigns openly on what our agenda truly is!

I have taken the leap so to speak and put my name forth to usher in this new era of transparency in electoral politics among our socialist parties.

I am officially registered with Elections Alberta as a nomination contestant with the New Democratic Party of Alberta for the constituency of Banff-Kananaskis.

I am rather excited.

The inspiring and foundational document which will guide my actions & campaign is none other than the LEAP MANIFESTO which was heartily embraced by the gathered federal NDP members in Edmonton last year.

It is hard to stop gazing in awe and inspiration at this profound and nation changing NDP endorsed document. I wish other other NDP comrades of mine would come out in the open to promote this brilliance.

I think if I shave my head the right way, I will be a ringer for St. Vladimir Lenin!

I will highlight the most important points from the LEAP Manifesto.

Shift swiftly away from fossil fuels so that Canada gets 100 per cent of its electricity from renewable resources within 20 years

We have about 18 years left to shut down each and every coal and gas fired generation plant in Alberta.

Be entirely weaned off fossil fuels by 2050.

We will ban all cars and natural gas heating in 30 years and of course end all oil and gas activities in Alberta.

No new infrastructure projects aimed at increasing extraction of non-renewable resources, including pipelines

All new projects MUST be stopped now. Under Notley we have been well on our way to that already but again, lets get our agenda out in the open.

“Energy democracy,” in which energy sources are collectively controlled by communities instead of “profit-gouging” private companies.

When all of Alberta is powered by wind, solar and unicorns in a few years, all of those sources of power will be managed by the collective.

End all trade deals “that interfere with our attempts to rebuild local economies, regulate corporations and stop damaging extractive projects.

Yes we will rip up NAFTA and all provincial trade agreements. Yes we will be sued and lose in Canadian courts (as with beer) and by the WTO. Who said that saving the world will be cheap though?

Expand low-carbon sectors of the economy, such as caregiving, teaching, social work, the arts and public-interest media.

Yes. We will employ everybody in these sectors and will have the state take full control of the media (for the public interest of course). These will be funded by the aforementioned unicorns. They are a fantastic resource.

Pay for it all by ending fossil fuel subsidies, imposing financial transaction taxes, increasing resource royalties, hiking taxes on corporations and the wealthy, introducing a progressive carbon tax, and cutting military spending.

And of course through unicorn exports.

So, why Banff-Kananaskis?

I grew up and graduated high school in Banff.

My home in Priddis will be within the Banff-Kananaskis constituency when the writ drops and the gerrymandering…  I mean new boundaries come into full effect.

Last but not least, while Banff-Kananaskis is indeed represented by one of my NDP comrades right now, he is something of a weenie.

I fear that we simply can’t take Cam Westhead at his word on things as deeply important to the NDP as adherence to the LEAP Manifesto.

We need honest representation from somebody such as myself who will stay open and true to The Ideology!

Along with working to implement the LEAP Manifesto, I will continue with Notley’s work on ending poverty through business regulation and minimum wage hikes. I will lobby to raise the minimum wage to $120 per hour and regulate us all to a one day work week. What a happy world we will be! Those corporate fat cats can afford to fund this.

I also pledge to unionize kindergartens and to have a statue of our true patron saint erected in every town square.

Be sure to get on board and support the new revolution!

First Banff-Kanasaskis, then maybe Cochrane or something. Its negotiable.

 

12 thoughts on “Cory Morgan for NDP in Banff Kananaskis!

  1. I an on board the: Morgan. Unicorn. Tickle. Train. (MUTT)
    Cory’s MUTT’s will push his NDP ‘Handcart of Healing’
    over the provincial election finish line!

  2. I thought I was reading an article from “The Onion”!

    I wish I could vote for you.

    I could make a T—shirt for your tho!

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