Ahh yes, the details of the great Bow River Flow event have finally been released. All this waiting and buildup for the grand event announcement is over. There had to be at least a dozen interested onlookers at the press kickoff.

 If one is bored enough to have a look at the saccharine-sweet website full of pot induced cliches and excuses for this non-event that will back traffic up for miles, a person would almost get the impression that this event was planned at last minute. That would be because it was.

 City hall has been getting rather skilled at retroactively re-branding their idiotic projects as the sleepy public is finally waking up to the gong-show this group of clowns has created with our tax-dollars. The ugly and expensive hamster tube bridge that was jammed down the public’s throat is now the “peace bridge” paying homage to our veterans. Strangely we never heard mention that this bridge was to be such a monument when the notion was tabled. Let’s be clear, being in opposition to this red and white atrocity that will visually pollute our river is not being in opposition to veterans. Another columnist threw out such names as possibly the “puppy dog bridge”. That way anybody being opposed to this vile waste of scarce tax dollars could be labelled as being anti-puppy.

 Now, back to Druh Farrell’s vapid closure of one of the busiest streets in Calgary. You see, when this anti-car idea was first conceived, Druh wanted utterly no public input and quietly tried to slip this closure through the back door. Druh’s original plan was to close Memorial Drive on every Sunday in August not just the one now. Druh had no plans for a festival of any sort or any other kind of event. Farrell simply wanted to bung up city traffic as cars are indeed the root of all evil.

 With massive public disgust becoming apparent with Druh’s little anti-travel venture, she was forced to back down and reduce this traffic-atery closure to a single day. People still recoiled at the pointlessness of this venture considering that there are two perfectly good bike paths right next to the road Druh is closing. Now with brilliant hindsight Druh and a handful of other tie-dye wearing throwbacks have scrambled and tried to make an event out of this pointless road closure.

 Lets have a look at what Calgarians have in store during this fine event.

“free coffee if you bring your Go Cup to Gratitude Cafe”

Wow, I can get a free cup of organic coffee. Oh it doesn’t stop there.

“the special price of $10 for their delicious vegan brunch.”

 Yummy. Organic, free range beans or whatever and for only $10. How Calgarian.

 We are not done there though. After having gained a calorie or two with your overpriced (and likely overcooked) beans, you can work it off doing Yoga. Yes, there is a Yoga workshop of course.

 Oh boy these folks know how to have fun. You know with all those beans and all that stretching, I do hope that people keep in mind that there are no public washrooms in the area at all.

 Oh and what would a street event be without buskers? Considering that city hall has all but killed downtown with parking fees and ugly “art” there is no longer a good venue for our musical beggars. Well, the under-talented and unemployed may bring their bongos and beat them for pennies to their heart’s content on Druh’s special day on Memorial.

 The website also says there will be street hockey. They are begging for teams to register however. The event organizers can’t play as they are too weak from their meatless diet. It remains to be seen how many will rush out for that game.

 Nausea makes me weak at times. That is what I experience when I read their website. Where do they get this stuff??

“Imagine a great flowing commonsthrough the heart of our city – an event that is inclusive of and accessible to all Calgarians “

 I am imagining it Druh. It is already there on those two bike paths next to the road you are closing.

 The site is loaded with comparisons with other cities of course. The people are bound and determined to make Calgary into something that isn’t, well, uh…. Calgary. New York and even a Columbian city are brought up as cities to be compared to. Why yes, I want to be part of a city controlled by drug lords (pick either). That certainly is something to aspire to.

While these clowns try to justify the unjustifiable, they trot out cities that do road closures for such events all over the world. What our wannabe hippies are trying to make Calgarians forget is that the aforementioned cities close back streets. Only Calgary has a council so stupid as to close one of only a few main east/west roads.

It will be a sad spectacle as we see traffic backed up for miles in the summer heat belching exhaust fumes upon 12 vegans squatting on the hot pavement doing yoga with offbeat bongos playing in the background.

Farrell makes over 6 figures of our tax-dollars for such brilliance.

There is much more background on this issue here. Just click on the Druh Farrell category on the right side of the page. Yes, our flower-child alderman has earned her very own category.